Kinship protocols
The information in this chapter was provided by Kim Bridge, Western Australia
The social organisation within families and communities often follows kinship behaviour rules or protocols. These protocols include avoidance, obligation and reciprocity.
Avoidance
Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander societies impose rules or establish expectations for all sorts of reasons. For example, in many communities, people in son-in-law/mother-in-law relationships avoid having eye contact or even being in the same place. To communicate with each other messages are passed through an appropriate third party or at a distance by sign language. The foundation for the many avoidance and non-avoidance relationships is to ensure respectful social relationships within a group.
Obligation and Reciprocity
Relationships of obligation and reciprocity are essential in all social structures. In many Aboriginal communities, for example, the uncles play an important role of education for males in their mother’s country. The young males are expected to support their uncles in reciprocal responsibility.
Rules of obligation and reciprocity create a culture of sharing between family and kinship members. This has implications for how many Indigenous people manage financial and business responsibilities. For many, accumulation of personal wealth may be less important than meeting their obligations to relations.
Examples of important cultural communications include:
-
Eye avoidance - some Indigenous people are taught not to hold strong eye contact in conversation. This can be difficult for non-Indigenous people to understand and can be interpreted as rudeness or disinterest.
-
Name avoidance - many Indigenous people throughout Australia follow the protocol of not saying the name of a deceased person for a period of time after their death. This includes not using the name of living people who have the same name.
-
Image avoidance - Aboriginal people from some parts of Australia avoid using (or seeing) the image of a deceased person including photographs or even drawings of them. That’s why some television stations issue warnings to Indigenous people that a program may contain the image of deceased people.
-
Disciplining of children - This role may not be the responsibility of their biological parents, but rather other extended members such as grandparents.
These protocols may not apply to all Indigenous people, but if you are to build respectful relationships it’s important for you to find out whether they are practiced in your area. Just ask – Indigenous people will consider your interest a sign of respect and be proud to answer your questions as best they can.
Previous Next